There is no magic single solution to keeping hearing aids on
students as they enter the tween/teen years.
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| Is this what your Child feels like?? |
It is ‘normal’ to want to ‘be normal’. All children struggle
with this to some degree. Rejecting hearing aids is usually an emotional
reaction to wanting to fit in. As children approach adolescence, how they view
the acceptance of their peers is very powerful. Being an accepted member of the
social group becomes increasingly important.
Taking off the hearing aids, saying they don’t need hearing aids and
pretending to ‘be normal’ are all emotional reactions to trying to ‘solve the
problem of fitting in.’ To the child, not wearing hearing aids is a solution to
an uncomfortable social/identity situation. Ironically, it is the students with
mild and moderate hearing loss – those who can hear closest to ‘normal’ with
amplification – who are at highest risk for rejecting their hearing aids
because they can ‘hear’ and are willing to try to ‘get by’ with the hearing
that they have.
Self-esteem is an important contributor to school success
and the confidence needed to function well in the mainstream setting. Without a strong, positive self-esteem our
students with hearing loss are at risk for rejecting their hearing devices,
just so that they can feel as though they ‘fit in.’ Sadly, many students have
actively made the choice that they would rather have peers and teachers believe
that they are not smart, than admit that they have a hearing loss. Only
actively talking about the issues and preparing students with resilience and
appropriate advocacy skills from an early age will address this issue.
Copied from - Addressing Self-Esteem and Issues of Fitting
In-
WHAT CAN I DO???
Ellen Rhodes, in the Nov/Dec 2014 Volta Voices issue
described her framework for working on psychosocial issues with tweens and
teens:
Help students to actively reframe situations in a positive
light (the glass is half full rather than half empty) glass is half full. In
that same vein, take turns playing fortunately-unfortunately with one person
being the optimist and the other being the pessimist in describing situations
specifically from a positive and a negative perspective.
Actively discuss how everyone can make mistakes, have
failures, and experience embarrassing moments and that we can learn much from
these experiences. Focus on generating a vivid positive mental image of how
challenges can be handled well in the future.
Discuss that self-identity (how you see yourself as part of
the world) can change based on the situation. Under easy listening conditions
they may view themselves as no different from a student with typical hearing.
Under challenging listening conditions they may view themselves as hard of
hearing, hearing-impaired or Deaf. It is important to help students explore
their feelings about each of the labels and recognize the aspects that make
them feel more/less “impaired” and that they can take action to deal with the
challenges (self-advocacy).
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Belonging
Each individual needs to feel as though they belong to one or more groups. Our
identities are defined by the groups to which we belong. If a student never
interacts meaningfully with other students with hearing loss, it is not
surprising that he or she may reject the part of themselves that does not ‘fit
in’ with the rest of the group. Whether it is face-to-face or through media,
children with hearing loss need to connect!
Encourage students who are feeling isolated to ‘take the
extra step in kindness.’ By offering to help others, using their unique and
positive attributes, they can realize that they are valued as group members.
Often it is the students with the weakest social communication (pragmatics
& theory of mind skills) who are at greatest risk for feeling isolated.
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Hayleigh sells Hearing Aid Jewels-
http://hayleighscherishedcharms.com/ |
START EARLY
An excellent article by Jay Luckner and Anne Molloy in the
Nov/Dec 2014 Volta Voices addressed the challenge of overcoming group
conversation issues. Some specific suggestions applied to what we can teach
children, even starting from preschool:
Throughout early intervention and into early childhood,
parents typically adjust their communication dynamics so that they face the
child and stand close when communicating. The child with hearing loss may not
realize that age-peers and other adults have no understanding of hearing loss
and what they might need for successful communication.
Raise the child’s awareness that most people they meet will
not understand that they have a hearing loss. The child, from a young age,
needs to be able to simply explain to others that they have a hearing loss and
may not always understand what is said.
The child needs to learn how to explain some strategies for
successful communication such as, “Please look at me when you talk. I need to
see your face when you talk so I can understand you.”
A strategy to learn in early elementary is to listen
carefully and then summarize what people say. “You want me to get my coat and
boots and meet you by the car.” “Oh, you
saw the movie Frozen and thought Olaf was funny too.”
A strategy to learn later in elementary is to practice ways
to remind friends and classmates that the student wants to be included in the
conversation such as, “Did you just change topics? I really want to follow what
you are saying and it’s kind of noisy here. Let me know when you change topics
so I can follow along.”
The major theme to get across is to teach the child that
people will be more likely to accommodate their needs if the child focuses on
sharing how much they want to be able to understand what the other person is
saying.
If these skills and strategies can be taught before the age
of 10, then the child will have a way to deal with challenging conversation
situations as a tween and teen.
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